The Test at Randolph County

By: Donald

When they sent me to Randolph County, I thought I knew what was going to happen. I was supposed to meet with my attorney. In my head, I had this picture that the charges might get dropped, or at least there’d be some kind of good news. I walked in with hope.

But instead, I got a whole different kind of lesson.

Face-to-Face with the Past

The first thing I saw when I got there was him.
A guy I used to know—used to trust. We’d been bunkmates during a past stretch. When we both got out, I let him borrow my car, helped him with some money. That’s just who I was—loyal to the people around me.

And he paid me back by stealing my car. And the cash.

Loyalty’s everything to me. And that betrayal stuck. So when he walked into that room in Randolph County, it was like the air got heavy. My chest tightened. All I could feel was anger, and all I could think was: I should make him pay for what he did.

The old me would’ve handled it right there. Quick, violent, and done.

Making a Different Call

But I didn’t.
I picked up the phone and called my sister.

I told her straight up, “I’ve got all these feelings right now. Before, I would’ve just beat him up and been done with it. But I’m trying to do things differently.”

She told me this wasn’t an accident—that it was a test. A chance to practice what I’ve been saying I want to be about. She reminded me that I’ve got to forgive myself before my sentencing. Not just because it sounds good, but because it changes how things turn out.

She said, “If you believe you deserve more time, you’ll get more time. But if you clear that out—if you forgive—you open up space for something better.”

And she’s right. I know she’s right.

Reaction or Creation

If I’d reacted—if I’d given in to that old pattern—I’d have been taking justice into my own hands. And it wouldn’t have ended there. I’d have gotten written up. Maybe caught another charge. Definitely added more time.

My sister told me something that stuck in my head:

“When you’re trying to control, you can’t create. Control is reaction. Creation is vision. Move the ‘see’ in reaction to the front, and you get creation. See first. Then choose.”

So that’s what I did. I stopped. I saw the whole picture. I chose.

I talked to him instead of fighting him. I let it go—not for him, but for me.

Freedom Inside

That day, I realized forgiveness isn’t about saying what happened was okay. It’s about not letting it chain you anymore. It’s about not being that same man who always reacts.

I’m learning that when you choose creation over reaction, you’re building something new—something better. And that’s what I want my life to be about now.